In what cultural historians are already calling the most predictable national event since Diwali crackers, Indians once again discovered that "May 13" sounds like "Main Tera" — and reacted as though they had personally decoded a message left by the universe specifically for them. The revelation was made, as always, by approximately 47 million people simultaneously, all of whom believed they were the first.
What changed this year: Google India — a company with a market cap larger than the GDP of several nations, staffed by some of the most educated engineers on the planet — decided to participate. They posted. They used the trend. They added emojis. Sources close to Google India say the decision was made in a "strategy meeting." Sources close to reality say the meeting lasted less time than an Arijit Singh bridge.
"Humein toh bas engagement chahiye tha," said an anonymous social media manager, who has since been promoted. "Maine socha nahi tha ki poori LinkedIn community existential crisis mein chali jayegi." The post received 2.3 lakh likes. The existential crisis is ongoing.
Meanwhile, actual work — code reviews, quarterly reports, product roadmaps — was suspended nationwide between 11:45 AM and 3 PM as employees screenshotted the Google post, sent it to 14 different WhatsApp groups, and sat quietly in the feeling. Some wept. Some called their exes. One person in Pune reportedly opened his resignation letter draft, decided against it, and ordered biryani instead. The biryani arrived in 9 minutes. The healing took longer.